Tomatoes, Jon and rattlesnakes a short story and sorta funny

[BudT]

A friend Jon (no not the jon here) decided one day he wanted to grow some tomatoes at his place in Tivy Valley Calif. now Jon's house sat at the base of (ta da sound) Tivy Mountain, what a coincidence huh. Any way being Jon was smarter than the average cowboy/fireman he decided to get some oak 1/2 barrels and put them on some 4x4's and grow maters in them, keeps them damn snakes out of the maters ya know. I was up to his place one day and we were looking at the maters and old Jon gets down on one knee to look into this mater plant at the maters. After a bit he starts bragging about how this keeps them damn snakes out of the maters, did I tell ya that Jon didn't like snakes? especially ones that bite. Anyway all of a sudden old Jon eases back turns white in the face and almost cant talk. Well seems as though a rattler had took up residence under the mater barrel and Jon saw him aimed at his crotch. I got him calmed down and while he went and got the 22 I got a long stick and when Jon got back and got ready I poked the snake out from under the barre to be dispatched. He wasn't a big snake maybe 2-2 1/2 feet long but big enough to swell old Jon's agates up if he hit him and that was his target. Did I mention Jon didn't like snakes lol, Jon got rid of the maters and has never grown any since. By the way Jon didn't see the humor in this bulls eye on his nuts. I've got other snake stories about Jon but those are for another day.
BudT

[bruce]

That's just low! Real real low down! :icon_jokercolor: Sincerely. bruce.

[Allen]

I take it Jon didn't like snakes.

[BudT]

Jon don't like snakes, any snake will do.

[JohnMOhio]

From the size of that snake, it would have made a nice hat band.

[BudT]

We weren't thinking hat bands at that time.

[Vern Humphrey]

Did I tell you Uncle Herbivore was killed by a rattlesnake? Bit him on the leg. Now, he had a wooden leg, and it was the wooden leg that got bit.

That leg swole up and swole up and finally he took it to the sawmill, had it sawed into lumber and built a house with it. One night, he was asleep in the house and the swelling went down. That house shrank to the size of a shoebox and crushed him. We didn't need a coffin -- just buried him still in the house. Dug the grave with a post hole digger.

[lyman]

^^^

Vern will be here all week folks,


try the Veal,

and please tip your waitress

[BudT]

From the size of that snake, it would have made a nice hat band.

John, one of Jon's nephews killed a rattler behind Jon's place in the tall grass that after the snakes head was cut off we measured to 60 inches and big around as a mans arm, pretty good size snake.